i have always kept a diary. i used to only write the good things so i could pretend to myself things were better. sometimes i can’t bear to relive a bad night so i just don’t, but generally i try and be entirely truthful when i write in it now - it can be deep and meaningful, or a ridiculous conversation i had with some guy on hinge. just enjoy documenting your life and getting thoughts out of your head. you can write to the diary like it is a friend or it is just an extension of yourself, i do both depending on my mood. like “hey diary”, or “hey holly”. so from a fellow girl who was a ‘pleasure to teach’, just have fun with it (it’s not for anyone but you). that’s the coolest thing you can do <33
this is so real. there’s this annoying need to perform, even for something as personal as a journal. i’m definitely still in this mindset, but i’ve been trying to get out of it. there’s this youtube video (you should keep a commonplace book (& how) by Crystal) that really helped me to come to terms with journaling. definitely still working on it, but i’ve been able to journal a little more lately <3 hope you will be able to too 💛
so I'm pretty bad at reading the room, but I reckon I should stop journaling in YouTube comments. No matter what compells me to comment. Also, its safer for me to assume anything positive is sarcasm in disguise - its easier to live at the sea floor. anything mildly neutral or good will uplift.
I feel the exact same way! Sometimes I can journal honestly, thoughts spilling out faster than my mind can think them, but other times it feels like I'm very self-consciously trying to write a book or something? Like I'm writing a story to be read, judging every word as if I'm a critic from the New York Times or something... and then I feel guilty about that, because I know it negates the whole point of journaling in the first place. You described these messy feelings perfectly.
so real!! i always feel like i'm holding back just the edge of the truth and i feel terrible for it because i know i'm robbing myself of such a pure form of self growth- examining myself without outside opinions. yet the whole time feeling that fucked up need to perform. might not be the best advice but i've started recently to reread old entries and add in updates on post its and it's been a nice bridge between telling the real truth and the palatable truth. that way i know whatever i say now can get 'corrected' later on and it makes me more at peace
i love how watching dakota's videos and immediately wanting to start journaling is a universal experience!!! i completely and utterly related to this post, especially that last para - from one "pleasure to teach" to another <3
I can relate to this so much. It’s as if i’m writing just in case someone digs up my journal in 100 years. I wonder if this says more about us than anything else. At least I’ve found that my people-pleasing wiggles its way into my journal. But it doesn’t need to, the journal is me! For me! Written to me!
this is so interesting! when I write in my journal, I like to be super honest, even if it's completely embarrassing and uncool, somehow I've convinced myself that this is what's cool, to just be vulnerable and open, so it works for me hahaha
It's funny when I saw this video of Dakota, I immediately thought the same thing.
I went straight for my diary and wrote frantically.
i only journal when she posts a vlog 😭😭 i hope she never stops posting...
i have always kept a diary. i used to only write the good things so i could pretend to myself things were better. sometimes i can’t bear to relive a bad night so i just don’t, but generally i try and be entirely truthful when i write in it now - it can be deep and meaningful, or a ridiculous conversation i had with some guy on hinge. just enjoy documenting your life and getting thoughts out of your head. you can write to the diary like it is a friend or it is just an extension of yourself, i do both depending on my mood. like “hey diary”, or “hey holly”. so from a fellow girl who was a ‘pleasure to teach’, just have fun with it (it’s not for anyone but you). that’s the coolest thing you can do <33
this is so real. there’s this annoying need to perform, even for something as personal as a journal. i’m definitely still in this mindset, but i’ve been trying to get out of it. there’s this youtube video (you should keep a commonplace book (& how) by Crystal) that really helped me to come to terms with journaling. definitely still working on it, but i’ve been able to journal a little more lately <3 hope you will be able to too 💛
still 0 clue how i got here.
so I'm pretty bad at reading the room, but I reckon I should stop journaling in YouTube comments. No matter what compells me to comment. Also, its safer for me to assume anything positive is sarcasm in disguise - its easier to live at the sea floor. anything mildly neutral or good will uplift.
I feel the exact same way! Sometimes I can journal honestly, thoughts spilling out faster than my mind can think them, but other times it feels like I'm very self-consciously trying to write a book or something? Like I'm writing a story to be read, judging every word as if I'm a critic from the New York Times or something... and then I feel guilty about that, because I know it negates the whole point of journaling in the first place. You described these messy feelings perfectly.
you just made me realise i feel the exact same way and haven’t been able to describe it, i loved this piece!! <33
so real!! i always feel like i'm holding back just the edge of the truth and i feel terrible for it because i know i'm robbing myself of such a pure form of self growth- examining myself without outside opinions. yet the whole time feeling that fucked up need to perform. might not be the best advice but i've started recently to reread old entries and add in updates on post its and it's been a nice bridge between telling the real truth and the palatable truth. that way i know whatever i say now can get 'corrected' later on and it makes me more at peace
i love how watching dakota's videos and immediately wanting to start journaling is a universal experience!!! i completely and utterly related to this post, especially that last para - from one "pleasure to teach" to another <3
I can relate to this so much. It’s as if i’m writing just in case someone digs up my journal in 100 years. I wonder if this says more about us than anything else. At least I’ve found that my people-pleasing wiggles its way into my journal. But it doesn’t need to, the journal is me! For me! Written to me!
Thanks for sharing and being vulnerable!
I enjoyed this a lot, made me chuckle, I feel the same way sometimes when I journal
this is so interesting! when I write in my journal, I like to be super honest, even if it's completely embarrassing and uncool, somehow I've convinced myself that this is what's cool, to just be vulnerable and open, so it works for me hahaha